2009- A wish-list!!!

Hmmm, well, so its 2009! 9 years into the new millennium and it just feels yesterday we were caught up with the y2k problem, which incidentally was the most memorable reminder of the new millenium, yes, such are the ironical times we live in!!

So, my hyperactive idle brain thought (well, I’m at home sweet home, you see!), why not ramble on something about the coming year, and what would we want from it. I initially thought I’d write something heavy, which I like doing, but then realized I’m not angry enough at this pointJ

So here goes, my own wish list for 2009:

Ø Starting with cricket (I’m a fanatic you see!), would love to see Dhoni send Zaheer & Bhajji to open the batting, given his penchant for surprising his opponents, & maybe bring himself on as the opening bowler, and have Venky Prasad with his super-slomo bouncers at the other end, which will dip on the batsmen with the speed of a lawn-mower, and the batsmen would get out bored of waiting for the ball at the wicket
Ø Coming to the other great Indian obsession- Bollywood, I’ve heard from reliable sources that Sanjay Dutt is building 12-pack abs (!!) after the 8-pack blitz we have had to endure from boy-man Aamir Khan. I wish Sanju baba and his packs well, and hope for the perennial no-hoper and woman-groper Shakti Kapoor to gun for 16 packs (not sure where the other packs would fit in one’s body, maybe a couple at the back and a few on the legs!)
Ø How can I forget the greatest Indian obsession-politics? Of course, given the current lot of rock stars we have in office, nothing much remains to be said, but with the general elections slated for this year, how about wishing for the great Dalit hope and messiah Mayawati to play the king-maker in an expectedly hung parliament and wrest the post of the prime minister of our country! That way we will soon have her statues adorning all important and critical public institutions like Nirmala(for the uninitiated- chain of super-clean and comfy public toilets), barber shops (given her stylish mane) and we would have only one national holiday- her birthday which would be celebrated with much pomp and prominent guests like Michael ‘Whacko’ Jackson, Bappi ‘the gold plated’ Lahiri & Samantha ‘thunder-thigh’ Fox would be asked to perform for the stunned audience!!
Ø Of course, how can I forget all of us, I mean all of you readers, many of whom have either already bitten the forbidden passion fruit, the eternal poison ivy, undertaken the mother of all battles- marriage, or are about to do so this year! Yes, I know there are many of us whose heads are on the chopping block, and the hour that would define our future is nigh, but fear not my friends, for we will fight till the finish, what say??

Well, enough of rambling on, and for those of you who have managed to reach this point without losing your mind, and are searching for me to beat me up, I’m not reachable currently, because I’m working on developing a half-pack stomach, which will be unveiled shortly!!